covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
