if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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