and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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