why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
