my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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