Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
