It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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