He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I am naked and annoyed.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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