The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize