Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
