Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
