His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
