hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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