Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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