my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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