Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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