I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
