I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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