I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We left the knife in your bed.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
