I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
