I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize