So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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