how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
