Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
