Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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