The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
