He uses pillows to masturbate.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
