Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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