That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Randomize
