Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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