So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
where are you?
Hypothermia
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
