if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I can feel your judgement through the phone
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
