so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
