he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize