I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize