How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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