Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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