We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
the liver wants what the liver wants
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
