We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
