sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
