put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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