Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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