it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
