GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
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