He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
he was CRYING into my vagina
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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