he shaved USA in his pubs
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
