i always forget guys have bellybuttons
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
