I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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