umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
