have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
